Haikollege.

This is the epic tale of how I coped with the fact that I would be doing my own laundry in college, in the form of ancient Chinese poetry. I hope you don't vomit.

I'm disappointed.
Laundry is no longer free
Darn stupid college.

I am in charge now.
I must wash ALL my clothing.
Darn STUPID college.

My mother and I
Embarked on a long journey
To procure supplies.

I am italics.
My mother has quotations.
I hope you get it.

--

No! Please no laundry!
I cannot pay for laundry!
I am far too poor!

"Fabric softener,
Detergent, stain remover..."
I do not like this.

Can't I use Febreze?
At least I will not smell bad!
"That is disgusting."

Now I had to pay,
Although I had no money.
I began to search.

Hmm...a stray quarter...
Can I have this for college?
I could wash...a sock.

Another quarter...
I could always just take it...
Daddy won't miss it.

"Here is some change, dear.
We saved it all in a jar,
Over twenty years..."

Sometimes my mother
Forgets important things, like
MASSIVE JARS OF CASH.

This jar was so big
That we could not carry it.
AND WE STILL HAD MORE.

Many hours later,
We had found many coin jars,
And snatched their silver.

Then Mom thought of one
That Dad had in his sock drawer.
We captured that too.

Unfortunately,
The jar had grown quite heavy.
Yet we plodded on.

It was very hard
To bring the coin jar upstairs,
And I almost died.

I apologize
For how very sucky these
Verses are getting.

Mommy thought deeply.
"I want to know the value.
Dump out the coin jar."

Why do we need to?
"For curiosity's sake."
Well that's annoying.

So we counted them,
All of those stupid quarters.
I was quite angered.

"Please! Let's just count them...................
ONE HUNDRED TWENTY DOLLARS.
Man, we are LOADED."

Now I am happy.
I can do all my laundry!

Well. If I have time.